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While shopping for some stuff for my boyfriend, we decided that Rosalynn needs summer clothing. She really doesn't have very many t-shirts and not a single pair of shorts. So while gawking at stroller prices we found that we had walked all the way into the toddler boys section. Nik found shirts he liked right away, including one that had a picture of microphones and guitar headstocks. Then we found some shorts, not too much different from the shorts I just bought for myself and picked up three pairs of them. We moved into the toddler girls section hoping to find more of the same, maybe in some different colors. Instead we found shorts that would barely cover her diaper, shirts that had a low neck line and bikini bathing suits. Did I mention my daughter is only 16 MONTHS old?

Yeah, hoochie mama clothing is being marketed to my daughter who cannot even speak yet and just learned to walk. The shorts really bothered me, why did they need to be so short? Of course they were all pink. We brought the stuff we did like (the boy stuff) home and my boyfriend's mom looked clearly disgusted when we showed her the clothing. "Why would you do something like that?" This coming from the woman who bought my daughter the ugliest pair of sneakers I have ever seen in my life and puffy sleeved shirts. Does it really matter which gender of clothing my daughter is wearing? I still buy clothing from the boys section and most of the girl stuff I buy looks like boys clothing.

After the the experience of Target trying to turn my toddler into a sex object, I read an article in Philadelphia magazine about moms taking their pre-teens to get manicures, pedicures, hair cuts and even bikini waxes and eye brows waxed. I can understand pedicures, my preteen niece got one when my sister got married (she actually got skulls on her big toes) but that was a special treat. I guess these moms are making these kind of spa treatments for their daughters on a weekly basis. Some moms even claimed it was a bonding experience (gag). While another made their daughter get bikini waxed before a casting call (even more creepy). Feministing noted this was something that only effect 1% of the population, but I don't agree with that. The oversexualation of young girls is happening at every level of society. Even in the same way with these types of beauty treatments.

It's really scary to me. I never want my daughter to grow up and have to deal with all of these issues. I just want to hold her tight and protect her from pedophiles and mass marketing.

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This is such an important point

A lot of parent-blaming (particularly mother-blaming) goes on when girls are scantily clad, but you put your finger on how difficult it can be for feminist parents to raise empowered girls in a patriarchal and consumerist society.

Btw, you should check out this post on raising boys and girls at Shakesville if you haven't seen it already.

Thanks for the blog think.

Thanks for the blog think. Feminism as a family value is an interesting concept. That means for me it will be even harder to empower my daughter when she has several bad examples to follow.

I totally agree

I have a young cousin, and it's always remarkable how little girls' clothing is becoming so revealing and grown up. I have noticed an interesting class divide in this; at more expensive children's clothing stores, the clothes tend to be more appropriate for the ages they're marketed towards, and at lower-priced stores, the clothes are much more revealing.

I can totally relate to this...

right now i ma staying with my good friends who have a 4 month old baby. It really amazes me how many people comment if i take her out for a walk and she is wearing blue, or a red t shirt, they automatically assume she is a boy, and when I tell them that no she is a girl, they look at me like, why is she wearing those clothes? When she was born I tried to find her some clothes for christmas, and was pretty upset with the outfits they had on display for baby girls, even newborn sleepers had to be pink, and the plain ones I liked were usually for little boys. I also dont understand why little girls need to wear different swinsuits to little boys? Our bodies look the same when we are children, why do they need bikini tops and such? Its just odd to me.

Ditto. My uncle and his

Ditto. My uncle and his girlfriend just had their little daughter two months ago and my mom's been going nuts with clothes shopping. I try to avoid the obvious (pink, cutesy dresses) but everything I find that's not pink with glittery hearts on it is inevitably in the boy's section. And while my mom's not too much into gender stereotypes, she refuses to buy her niece boy's clothing. So I've been going all feminist on her and picking out the least offensive clothes in the girl's section. So far, no pink. I hope some day my little cousin will appreciate it. :)

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My Fat Body
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acceptance | body image | fat | self-esteem

I am fat. When I say this, I'm describing one particular aspect of myself. I am not criticizing or judging, nor am I inviting other people to do so or asking for assurances that I'm pretty. In my mind fat is a descriptor like any other. It is not a judgment.

I have a very active life. I skied almost every other day this winter, and had an eight hour ski patrol shift every Saturday. I walk everywhere it is practical to do so and some places it is not. My kayaking season started today and will last until it is too cold to do anything but look forward to skiing. My fat body can do all of these things as part of my routine.
» read more | Jill's blog | 77 comments
Let Girls Be Girls
Submitted by Brooke on April 15, 2008 - 3:05pm.
girlhood

While shopping for some stuff for my boyfriend, we decided that Rosalynn needs summer clothing. She really doesn't have very many t-shirts and not a single pair of shorts. So while gawking at stroller prices we found that we had walked all the way into the toddler boys section. Nik found shirts he liked right away, including one that had a picture of microphones and guitar headstocks. Then we found some shorts, not too much different from the shorts I just bought for myself and picked up three pairs of them. We moved into the toddler girls section hoping to find more of the same, maybe in some different colors. Instead we found shorts that would barely cover her diaper, shirts that had a low neck line and bikini bathing suits. Did I mention my daughter is only 16 MONTHS old?
» read more | Brooke's blog | 47 comments
The "First" Pregnant Man
Submitted by Brooke on April 8, 2008 - 5:34am.
media | parenting | pregnancy

Thomas Beatie is legally married, legally male and pregnant. His pregnancy has caught the attention of numerous media outlets, even Oprah and People magazine. Originally thought to be a hoax, his ultrasound on Oprah along with an interview with him and his wife, seems to have convinced the public that this man is pregnant.

Thomas Beatie is transgendered man. The biology behind is pregnancy is pretty simple. By stopping testosterone injections Thomas Beatie was able to get pregnant through artificial insemination. It's hard for me to believe Thomas Beatie is the first pregnant man for this reason. Some websites claim the first pregnant man was a transgendered, homosexual man about 20 years ago. Some intersex individuals who live as men can also have children, so it's very possible Thomas Beatie is not the first pregnant man.
» read more | Brooke's blog | 61 comments
The Third Gender: Transsexualism in Women-Oriented Atmospheres
Submitted by Kym on April 5, 2008 - 6:11pm.
inclusion | LGBT | Michigan Womyn's Music Festival | transgender | transsexual

The Michigan Womyn’s Music Festival, also known as “Wombfest” or simply “Michigan,” has been held annually in early August in a northern Michigan forest since 1976 (“General… Information”).The festival’s central goal has been to create a woman-centered atmosphere where women can celebrate being women in an area free of male presence and patriarchy (“Out and About“). Although Michigan is not the first festival to celebrate women (“A… History“) , it is the longest running, looking to celebrate its thirty-second anniversary in August 2008 (“Rebuttal… Straight”).
» read more | Kym's blog | 49 comments
Assumptions
Submitted by Julia on April 1, 2008 - 2:46am.
feminism | reproductive rights | reputation

Sorry I haven't posted for the longest time, and I'm definitely going to make up for it. For instance, from a recent Newsweek article about pregnant surrogates:

"many conservative Christians decry the practice as tampering with the miracle of life, while far-left feminists liken gestational carriers to prostitutes who degrade themselves by renting out their bodies."

What? I have literally never heard that once in my years (admittedly few, but whatever) as a feminist. Of course, there were no sources to accompany this bold statement. On examining the statement, I found that the only source to really condemn the practice was an old edition of OBOS. And we all know that the Boston's Women Health Book Collective, while a group that I am immensely grateful for and respect deeply, certainly does not speak for all feminists.
» read more | Julia's blog | 30 comments | 6 new comments
But Europe is so much more Progressive!
Submitted by Joey on March 8, 2008 - 6:18pm.
contraceptives | myth | news | research | sex education

When I am in the US or talking to Americans, I am often told how lucky I am to be living in Europe where people aren't all prudes and where sex is not a taboo topic. I always end up wondering where that myth comes from, as there are so many ways in which it is not true.

I was reminded of this again yesterday, when I stumbled across a study on contraception use among teenagers in Italy. An article on the study (found in yesterday's edition of the Milan Metro paper) stated that 30% of youths do not use any method of birth control at all and 20% use the 'withdrawal method'. Also prevalent amongst teens are urban myths about ways to prevent pregnancy, such as having sex standing up or washing out the vagina with coca cola afterwards. Too, 8 out of 100 women of all age groups do not use any birth control at all, and according to the organization of Gynecologists in Italy, the main reason women give for not using the pill is a fear of gaining weight.
» read more | Joey's blog | 42 comments | 6 new comments
Tom Lykes Talk Show
Submitted by Mae on February 27, 2008 - 6:58pm.
talk show | Tom Lykes

A little while ago I got into the radio again and I started browsing for a new radio station to listen to and I love talk shows so I stopped at the Tom Lykas show...
Besides his annoying voice. . . He's one of the most misogynist people I have ever heard in my life.
And most say he's just the best on it.
It drives me crazy how many people AGREE with this person about women.

For a while, I was thinking of calling and just yellin' whatever I wanted. Seemed fun.
But even if I get close to that, I freak out.
Shyness, I guess.
But, blah..

He's irritating. I hate him. I want to kill him.
» read more | Mae's blog | 26 comments | 10 new comments
History Forsaken
Submitted by Kym on February 23, 2008 - 9:19pm.
American Religious History Week | conformity | religion

I don't know how many of you know about this, but the House of Representatives here in the US introduced a bill on December 18th that will designate the first week in may as "American Religious History Week." Here's what they're hoping to accomplish:

"Resolved, That the United States House of Representatives----

(1) affirms the rich spiritual and diverse religious history of our Nation's founding and subsequent history, including up to the current day;

(2) recognizes that the religious foundations of faith on which America was built are critical underpinnings of our Nation's most valuable institutions and form the inseparable foundation for America's representative processes, legal systems, and societal structures;
» read more | Kym's blog | 36 comments | 8 new comments
Michfest
Submitted by Kym on February 23, 2008 - 4:43pm.
Michigan Womyn's Music Festival | transgender | unity

I've been researching the controversy between Michfest and Camp Trans lately, because I read somewhere that Bitch and Animal weren't going to be allowed to perform because Animal is transgendered. This really upset me.

Michfest holds that it is open to only "womyn-born-womyn" who have lived their whole lives as womyn. I get what they're aiming for with the principle of creating a solely womyn oriented space, but by not allowing transgendered people to attend... it's a little too exclusionary for my taste. I was planning on attending Michfest this year, but when I read about all of this controversy, I was totally turned off. I was looking forward to a womyn only space as an exhilerating and life-changing experience... I still would like to experience it, but I'm turned off by the fact that they won't allow womyn to attend if they haven't been womyn their whole lives.
» read more | Kym's blog | 56 comments | 13 new comments
AGA Roll Call: Goodbye to all That
Submitted by Brooke on February 20, 2008 - 11:28pm.
AGA Roll Call: Goodbye to all That

Ugh. I am so tired of "feminist" and members of previous generations telling mine how to act, think, vote, raise our children, how to exist in this society. So here is my response to Robin Morgan and people who share her point of view:

Stop insulting young women! Stop embracing the stereotypes that surround us that have been created by a sexist media and a sexist society. Stop calling us stupid. Stop calling us sluts. Stop calling us ignorant. Stop trying to divide us based on our age, race, class or sexuality.

Look around you. Look at the women in my generation who have graduated from college or are going to college. Look at the number of young women you see behind and in front of you in line when you go to vote. Look at the number of young women at protests defending a woman's right to abortion access and contraception. Look at the number of young women defending the right for gay couples to get married and adopt children; for gay couples to work in the military. Look at the number of young mothers who have attended rallies defending women's rights to breastfeed in public and in the work place, who have defended the right of midwifes to practice their profession (and all of the women who are not mothers, but still defend those rights). Look at the women who are active in civil rights and race equality in the workplace, on college campuses and in the court system. Look because we are not just women, we are members of various communities who are also looking for equal rights. Look at my generation as a movement of people, a movement of women and a movement of feminist.
» read more | Brooke's blog | 37 comments | 21 new comments
AGA Roll Call: Goodbye to all That
Submitted by Kampire on February 11, 2008 - 4:58am.
AGA Roll Call: Goodbye to all That | elections | feminist theory | Hilary Clinton | radical | Robin Morgan

When women took over Rat press in 1970 Robin Morgan sat down to write an editorial that would resonate way beyond that time. In it she took on and dispatched quickly with "female chauvinist pigs" and hypocrtical men who called themselves revolutionaries.

"Goodbye to all that shit that sets women apart from women; shit that covers the face of any Weatherwoman which is the face of any Manson Slave which is the face of Sharon Tate which is the face of Mary Jo Kopechne which is the face of Beulah Saunders, which is the face of me which is the face of Pat Nixon which is the face of Pat Swinton."
» read more | Kampire's blog | 45 comments | 28 new comments
Women's Media
Submitted by Jill on February 5, 2008 - 1:19am.
community | media | support | women

With the exception of my books, I have a very modest media collection. I just don't spend that much time watching television and movies or listening to music. However, I am interested in women and supporting us in every way I can. So, given my commitment to women and feminism, how is it that my modest media collection is primarily composed of men's works?

I'm not trying to argue that men aren't worth watching, reading, listening to, or otherwise supporting; men do create some wonderful things, worth the investment of my time and money. I'll never be willingly separated from East of Eden, and my love of Tom Petty appears to be limitless, but how have men and their creations taken up so much more of my shelf space than women and our creations?
» read more | Jill's blog | 32 comments | 16 new comments
Blog for Choice
Submitted by Joey on January 22, 2008 - 2:09pm.
abortion | Blog for Choice | politics

Today is national Blog for Choice Day.

I did not sign up because I was not sure whether I'd have the time, but I think it's really pretty important to get the word out anyway. The topic this time around is: Why is it important to vote pro-choice?

Here's why I think voting pro-choice is important: We're all going to be faced with tough choices at some point in our lives, and with a lot of those choices, we can never know how we'll react until it happens to us. It's easy to judge, and it's easy to rationalize and theorize, but ultimately all of that means very little when the situation arises. And when we're in those situations, it's always best to have as many options as possible, and to have information about all of them, and to then be able to make the decision that is best for us at the time.
» read more | Joey's blog | 32 comments | 19 new comments
Used to be (for Maria)
Submitted by Kampire on January 20, 2008 - 7:37pm.
poetry | rape | rapist | triggering

“Actually, Buju Banton* used to be a rapist, I believe”

The hippy said to us, pouring the mixture through the strainer.

Good reggae vibrations floated toward me as I pondered,

“What does it mean to have once been a rapist?

Is it something you can shed like a torn coat, or a snake skin, a piece of baggage you can just set down?

An old Nazi uniform you can just take off, “he used to gas Jews but he’s cool now.”

Bathed in the blood of Jesus or the word of Jah,

Saved

Redeemed

Born Anew

Hallelujah!

How convenient for you, to move through these rigid identities.

I too used to be.

I used to be a victim but I finally managed to shrug off that heavy bloodstained dress, though no white man washed me clean.

Now I wear a survivor badge, heavy like iron over my heart.

I used to be

I used to be free

You took that away from me.

Marine runs away to Mexico

Maria condemned, unbelieved, gets a shallow grave.

She was 20, like me.

I open my mouth to ask the guys

What does it mean to “used to be a Rapist”?

And why don’t the raped get that luxury?

of used to be

But they are already talking about something else
» read more | Kampire's blog | 38 comments | 22 new comments
Me, Myself, and I
Submitted by Kym on January 19, 2008 - 10:19pm.
identity

There are several terms that come to mind when I think of how I define myself as a person: activist, woman, and believer. Yes, I could label myself as a teenager, a vegetarian, or an atheist, but they only describe what I am, not what I believe in. These labels, in their own right, are both more complex and simpler than they would appear.

The most defining of these labels is my identity as a woman, which impacts my life on a daily basis. Being a woman may only mean that I do not have a penis and that, yes, I bleed, but it is also so much more than that. Being a woman means that I have seen and can identify with the oppression that women around the world face by dint of being women. Being a woman means that I have to deal with the conception that women are weaker physically and mentally. Being a woman means that, historically, I must do things twice as well to be considered half as good as a man. There is nothing more empowering or limiting than identifying yourself as a woman. In accepting the label of femininity, I have accepted the challenges that my gender faces in the search for equality in today’s society. In the past, women were almost universally perceived as being the weaker of the two genders, which led to the assertion of “male dominance.” These conventional stereotypes make it difficult to identify as a woman in that they project the historical view of the female and do not celebrate the individual strengths and weaknesses that each woman possesses.
» read more | Kym's blog | 34 comments | 21 new comments
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