girlfriends

Living in a women's community means more than buying tampons in bulk. I've been living with women only for the past 4 years but only now do I understand the difference between living with women and living in a women's space.

My apartment gives off a vibe that is uniquely female. When you walk in you are likely to encounter either me or one of my roomates (or all three of us) in various stages of undress. We shower and use the bathroom with the door wide open so that we can better hear and sing along to the music that plays almost 24 hours a day.

My roomates and I spend hours a day lying on each other's bed's like clichéd 50's teenage girls but not gossiping, truly sharing. Sharing in the way that our society dismisses as "girly" and unimportant.

Three years ago, our summer of 15, we didn't really have boyfriends. We went to shows with bad music and survived by checking out the not-so-bad-looking guitarists, singers, bassists, Cheez, and sometimes just boys in tight pants. Sure, we had to get rides from our parents and never had any money, but we were a unit and even though I fell in that fountain it was still The Girls.

At 16 we did have boyfriends, but I'll be damned if they were (always) our central preoccupation. We did stuff together, and vented about our stupid boys to one another. Girlfriends were as important then as they are now, however...

I've always had a difficult time forming close, meaningful relationships with females. So over the years, most of the deep, personal conversations I've had about relationships have always been with males and, therefore, always been from the point of view of 'the other side'.

However, more recently, I have managed to get close to two young women who have become incredibly important to me and who I feel I've really bonded with. Along with one other girl I met many years ago through an online community, they are the only two females who I really share personal things with and who I will go to for advice or if I just need a shoulder to cry on.

First of all, apologies for being so quiet lately. My summer is coming to an end so I have been and will continue to be ridiculously busy over the next couple of weeks.

I had forgotten how nice it is to have girlfriends. Like many girls who find themselves labeled “different”, I have a lot of male friends. I have heard it echoed around AGA and by many other young women, guy friends just involve less drama. There isn’t as much cattiness, the group dynamic is more straightforward and the fun is often more physical.

At the end of a summer of new friends and experiences with new cultures, I have come to re-appreciate good girlfriends. Allow me a moment in which to appreciate my girlfriends, old and new.