weight

I finally applied for health insurance today. It's a bit of a catch-22: I need health insurance so that I can get the help I need to get back in the work force, and I need a job to really afford this insurance. So the hope is just that it will work out: get the insurance, get healthy, get a job, pay for the insurance. Here's to hoping.

Anyway, this post isn't about the evils of capitalist medicine. It's about height and weight. Apparently.

I browsed plans for hours, agonizing over the financial implications of each. I wrote emails to various family members, asking how much if any help they could give, etc. Finally, after nitpicking the details of every eligible plan, I settled for one that costs $158 per month. (So high? It's the perpetual catch, isn't it: if you don't have any money, you can't afford a big deductible. If you can't afford a big deductible, you have to pay almost as much in monthly payments anyway.)

In the past few months since my house burned down I have lost weight. I am not sure how much since I don't own a scale, but I bought pants in size 4, 3 and 1 for work. My size 4 pants I can take off without unbuttoning, my size 3 pants keep falling down even with my belt on and I just noticed my size 1 pants are starting to be big around the waist as well. Actually, my belt isn't small enough anymore.

I'm not proud of my weight. I'm proud of the muscles I have now that I carry around heavy things at work and chasing around my toddler at home. But the skinny look, I just didn't work for it. If anything it's probably a sign that I am not healthy. I don't always eat three meals a day and I should probably be eating closer to 6 since I am still nursing my daughter. It doesn't help that the food where I work sucks and some days my dinner is an orange and a yogurt. At least some science leans towards calorie reduction as the way to live past a 100, so maybe I will live longer?